Body under construction – work in progress, so please pardon the….

Ever see the construction signs where there is major renovation occurring and management puts out the “please pardon the dust” signs with a promise of a future new and better design?  It is during this time that CHANGE is happening!! Out with the old and in with the new. Time for a rebirth. Time to reach for your dreams, so you can live authentically instead of letting food choices rob you of health and happiness. Well, that’s sounds fabulous to me so in this moment I am putting out my sign, and  I recommend you do the same.

The way I see it, our life is in progress all the time. I try to live each day to its fullest and not put off adventures with stinkin’ thinkin’ like "when I lose weight I will then try…" We often surrender control over to family, work and a thousand other responsibilities putting our real needs last, and at some point there is steep price to pay to neglecting our physical, mental and spiritual well being.  So in this case, management, me, is putting out the sign, putting my family and all of you on notice, and promising myself a new and better future design. I’m taking back control with an emphasis on getting my body fit and healthy, and enjoying the journey to wellness.

Why the notice? Mostly, for yourself to remind you that you need to prioritize differently. Choose differently. Consider family members who will resist your desire and efforts to change and the many mundane responsibilities that undermine your progress.  Really, who can argue with a goal of being healthy? Well, argue is a strong word. Is there anyone who would sabotage your goal(s)? Who will miss you if you are out for a 30 minute walk or at the gym for an hour?  Do you undermine your progress with doubt, excuses, and a lack of planning? Or perhaps something or someone is of higher priority over your goal. Getting healthy needs to be at the top and it is deserving of your attention. Make this happen.  

To ensure success with our remodeling project, you must have a plan. Working 40 plus hours makes it more difficult to find time for exercise, but not impossible. Our children have needs. Couple time is a must. Family members and holiday plans interrupt our best intentions. If you are determined to remodel, think of all the challenges or excuses you may face or make and begin a counterattack. You are worth the effort. You can do this. Your rewards will be unimaginable.   

The check list:

Ø      The blueprint has been finalized.

Ø      The work in progress time line is reasonable.

Ø      Incentives are planned for when the work is done on time and when I have done a fabulous job. (And no, food is not the incentive)

Ø      Also there are grand plans for what adventures await when my renovation is complete.

For now, here is my sign: “Body under construction/work in progress, so please pardon my absence as I am out walking, jogging or at the gym; my meal planning and all the attention I am paying to quality healthy food and my need to eat different then you; my positive attitude and renewed determination;, and my need to get some much needed rest.” Grand re-opening May 2010. New and improved….and worth all the effort.

Fiercely committed,

Denise

“Let your clarity define you.”

As I was working away in my office, the radio was on as a soothing back drop to the chaos transpiring during these H1N1 influenza planning days of public health. When a line from a beautiful song just resonated with me, so I wrote it down to think about it a bit more.

“Let your clarity define you.”

What an amazing concept. Simple. Clear. True.

So, let me clarify something with you! I am crazy with food. Out-of-control way too often. Pure insanity.  I have turned to food because:

I was emotional.

I was bored.

I was socializing.

I was celebrating.

I was happy.

I was stressed.

I hid it for later, and now it is later.

I had a coupon for this bargain fast food.

I was tired.

It was there.

It’s the weekend.

It’s a holiday.

It was “homemade.” 

It was a co-worker’s birthday treat.

Because the clock said 12:00/noon.

It looked good.

I was in a hurry.

To even off the row…

So it wouldn’t go to waste.

It’s a ritual.

I craved something sweet.

I craved something salty.

I craved something crunchy.

Because I couldn’t stop…

Well, you probably get the point. Or worse yet, you are like me. You understand my foodie insanity.

You know the desperate desire to be in control over all your food demons. You know, the Monday morning euphoric feeling of control and hopefulness that fills you? That’s right, the first day of the rest of your life that you commit to eat healthy, get fitness scheduled into our busy day, and look and feel great about yourself. Yahoo! And then in a moment, “poof” that magical feeling is gone. We relinquished our power to the food demons. Lost control. Helpless not hopeful.  And we find ourselves self-loathing, and wishing we were gifted with fitness and a svelte body. Resentful that we are tortured by fatness, and know and live the struggle of wanting to be different then what we are.  Wishing we looked great and more importantly felt great. How can we be so motivated one moment and so decimated the next? How can we handle letting ourselves down one more time? And, the shame we feel as we face our family members that often have endured right along with us and yet so apparently given up believing in us?

So, let’s think about the one single line of a beautiful song: “Let your clarity define you.”

It is time. We must come to terms with our addiction. Recognize it, but know it does NOT define us. The power exists in each one of us to live the authentic life we are meant to live. The first step is facing it – looking evil in the eye and NOT backing down.

Now to make a lifestyle change is not easy as we all know. In order to make change, it is important to make baby steps toward the ideal. Out with the old and in with the new in a moment’s time does not work. So, my first question is what is your ideal self? Who do you want to be? What do you want to be? What does a great day consist of for YOU?  Do you even know anymore? Has too many years of living as a person of size defined you, your activities, and your happiness?  If it has, not one more day or even moment should pass where this should be okay with you.  It is, simply said, time to fight for YOU!    Make no qualms about it. This is a fight to regain your health and happiness. We are being robbed of joy, peace and good health that we are so deserving of! The thief :your old thought patterns and unconscious beliefs. Your drug of choice is sugary foods, fast foods, high fat foods, too much food! We must embrace the fact we have the power to re-program our unhealthy relationship with food. Dig deep. You are deserving. You are worth the effort. Chances are, your greatest obstacle is YOU – the fact you underestimate what you are capable of accomplishing. Everything you need to succeed is IN YOU!

And in a moment of calm, you really know what makes you happy. You can close your eyes and envision your dream body/dream life/dream adventures. Prioritize. Make a plan.  Work your plan consistently. Get ready to be happier and healthier then ever. When find yourself using food to soothe a wound to your spirit or out of habit, STOP, take a moment, and rather let your clarity define you.

As always, I am in your corner cheering you on!

Denise

“Man can not discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore!

                                                                                                                     ~unknown

Beginning.

There is always a beginning. A fresh start!

Some people begin every Monday with renewed determination. Yet find they all too soon fail to keep their resolve and they accept defeat and end their beginning. Just like that – an all or nothing approach. This use to happen to me for about a 20 year span of my adult life…until a Tuesday evening in July 2003 at about 8:15pm in the evening. My beginning was a simple 15 minute walk.

So, I believe in beginnings.  I believe that beginnings bring hope. Hope is a beautiful, magical gift we can give our self. Know that no matter how sad you are, how shamed you may feel by your body, how frustrated by your perceived notion of lack of will power, how empty you may feel from your busy demanding life that takes energy and time resources and yet rarely gives back to you any true joy…Hope has us believing in a better day, and yes a better body.  Yet, hope is not enough to create the change we so desire. So, think hard as to what change you really want. Negotiate what it is you would be willing to change to reach the goal and be realistic. Be specific and think time lines.

Create a visual of the new you. Embrace the vision. So, this is not just “I want to lose weight.” When goals are to ambiguous, broad, and overwhelming (e.g. like the task to lose 50 or more pounds) it can become easy to in a moment’s time “give in to temptations” rather then stay the course with your healthy and self controlled eating plan and planned fitness regimen.  And, too often, when we give in once to a temptation, we find it is a slippery slope that lands us back to where we use to be. We once again find ourselves accepting hopelessness and helplessness. We, for whatever reason, accept the ending of our dream. But, I challenge you to not accept defeat. It does not have to be that way ever again. Be brave. Be resilient. Strive for consistency not perfection. Be willing to say you are worth it above all and anyone else that you have to deal with. 

I believe the best beginnings start with a goodbye to yesterday. Goodbye includes recognizing it is the past that you can not change, that you may need to forgive yourself for what you did and things you did not do, that the past is a by-gone and the true amazing gift is today. The gift of the past is two fold: those amazing memories to be cherished and lessons we learned along the way that now makes us a better person for having lived through it. Today’s gift is the gift of choice.  That each moment you are choosing what to put in your mouth and how to move or not to move your body.

If right now you can figure out from your past all the things that you have put above “you” then you can start to strategize and create an action plan on how to prioritize you and your dreams. This should make your action plan more simple.

Some beginnings begin before we are ready to end. Life is like that. It takes courage to consciously let go of what we are use to.  If you have used food as a crutch, it is time to change that fact. If you do not get 30-60 minutes of exercise six of seven days. It is time to change that too. Begin today – in this moment. Not next Monday after Easter or when it gets warmer or not when you have a vacation day…begin with one simple change that you have the power and pleasure to do differently. Do for the one most important reason that I can think of: YOU!

As always I am in your corner cheering you on!

Denise  

January 29, 2009

“Food Peace”

Two simple words.

Certainly I know what “food” is all about…Let’s see, how about: baskets full of unlimited salty matador chips the size of my hand and a delicious spicy seven layer bean, sour cream, guacamole, salsa dip topped with a sprinkle of fresh veggies;  warm, fresh, just out of the oven double chocolate chip cookies that make the whole house smell wonderful;  an inch and a half thick medium rare succulent prime rib with a steaming baked potato mounded with butter and sour cream; piping hot baked garlic bread served with a seasoned olive oil dip; buttermilk pancakes stacked high with whipped butter caressing each cake and maple syrup cascading down the sides with three crisp bacon strips off to the side….and I could go on and on. Food.

Peace.  Hmmmm…You can read daily an opinion regarding our very country needing to seek and fight for world peace. Harmony. Understanding. Serenity. Tranquility. Basically getting along! These words help to describe peace. We are told to be peace-seekers. So this makes me believe that to be in possession of “peace” is an ultimate and grand goal.

Now, putting the two words together creates the term: food peace. Combining these two words will very concisely separate the individuals who need to lose a few pounds from the real “foodies.”  Because, if you are a foodie, you are constantly at war with your thoughts and feelings about food. Often you feel out of control of both thoughts about food and your actions in regards to food. For many of you, you shamefully know what I am already speaking of.  A foodie can divinely continue to add descriptions of favorite comfort foods to my above list.  A foodie describes food in terms of their favorites that seem to promise to fulfill an emotional void, or relief to a long, disappointing and stress-filled day, or the ability to add euphoric bliss to a joyless day.  If you are not a foodie, when you read the food description above you probably found yourself wondering why there seemed to be samples of a neighborhood restaurant menu. Truly food should have been described more accurately in terms of macronutrients we call: fats, carbohydrates, and proteins. We can also refer to food as “fuel for the body.”

The end of January is a perfect time to discuss food peace.  New Year’s resolutions galore were launched early this month in high hopes that the dieter would be down 5-15 pounds by now. In fact, a friend even wrote explaining that the New Year brought her  this new found hope.  So this got me thinking, I don’t want my friends to lose hope if a diet has failed them so far or worse, if they think they have failed themselves so far!  Perhaps we find the elusive quest to perfectly control food intake is gone or maybe a person had not consistently gotten in 30 minutes of exercise due to an over busy life. Perhaps visions of lean and fit, shorts and swim suits, beach vacations and amusement roller coasters are slowly disappearing. 

If your current diet plan is failing you now, let me help you re-program on a different objective. Instead of focusing on food, or more concisely, the lack of food, let’s think and focus on “food peace.” PEACE is an opportunity for healing to start. (And if you are a foodie, you are in desperate need of healing. Peace does take renewed commitment to maintain.  Evil forces like sugar, birthday and holiday eating, and all-you-can-eat pot lucks or buffets…erode and rob us of peace/of life/of who we are meant to be.

.

Foodies need to admit they are a foodie. You must wage war on food and your ole’ way of thinking …and acting (habits) to actually gain moments of food peace. Eventually your moments of food peace become more united and food will have less control over you and you may find as your “inside” perspective is changing your body follows next. This is a battle worth waging. This is a battle that truly is a fight for your life, because we all know, and too often deny, that morbid obesity results in premature death.  This is a battle you must win in order to live the authentic life you are meant to have, and for you to become healthier and happier then you ever imagined.

A foodie does NOT have food peace when you:

• hide food to eat it secretly later.
• binge eat and hate yourself during and after.
• eat when you are not hungry.
• hear food “calling” your name and you feel powerless NOT to consume it.
• actual think you will eat one cookie or three bites and end up eating the whole carton of ice cream, the whole bag of chips, the whole pie…
• swear it is the last time you will ever  eat “that” again and an hour later you swear that item off again.
• finish eating and immediately start planning your next snack or meal.
• obsess about all the food you have self imposed a “not allowed to eat” and you feel tortured.
• hit the drive through and order enough food for two or three people and have it gone by the time you get home.
• every Monday start your diet “for real.”
• say you LOVE a food or a food item.
• overeat until you feel nauseous or actually contemplate vomiting to feel better.
• eat and feel ashamed or like a failure when you did so.
• graze mindlessly through the day, often starting from the time you get up to the time you go to bed.
• dream of food.
• buy your family or friend a birthday cake and it is your favorite cake.
• cut a bagel in half or in thirds at work and then return two to three time to finish eating your fair share.
• have food cravings and arrange your day to get your fix.
• use local fast food establishment so much, the workers know your name or your regular order. Do you really use your debit card too?
• use food as an emotional crutch.
• skip meals, starve yourself, use laxatives or diuretics or fast for long periods of time so your can splurge and overindulge in a one big overboard meal.  (This is not the salad for lunch option so you can eat in a restaurant for your evening meal plan.)
• eat your kid’s candy out of their Easter baskets or Halloween bags without asking permission…thinking they won’t notice, but you eat so much how could they not!
• late night snacking especially on highly salty and fatty foods and wake up feeling bloated the next morning.
• stand persistently in front of the fridge or cupboard looking for nothing in particular to eat, but eating away you are.
• overeat late at night so you can not sleep comfortably.
• promising yourself to do an extra 30 on the treadmill or walk another mile because you are impulse eating, but of course, you never do the exercise.
• eat your family’s leftover so they never make it to the fridge.
• ever lied about eating an item someone else was planning on eating.
• threw away “evil” food only to dig it out of your trash a few hours later.

…and I unfortunately could go on with more examples.

Know this – a foodie’s life can be managed.

Once you are a foodie – you will always have foodie tendencies, BUT you ultimately can gain food peace with the right focus and consistent efforts.  Please do not lose hope.

Foodies must start small in terms of habit changes. Changing your relationship with food - the ongoing battle of what to eat, when to eat, when to stop eating, I'm NOT eating, I ate it and now I need to punish myself ...all needs to change. It is a vicious cycle.  The outcome of a foodie's habits is a body that is big. Change is possible.  The one change I am suggesting is adding more water to your daily plan. Water is a natural detox beverage. Our body is 60% water and water is an essential need. In this moment you can consume more water. Go get some water. Tomorrow drink more water. Minimum of 64 oz a day up to half your body weight in water. Of course, NOT all at once.  Drink water through out your day. Water is great. Water is a main staple in my plan, please make it in yours too. Caution: If you are buying bottled water, please read the label. Even healthy sounding water can have sugar, chemical additives, and calories hidden in it.  

Stay tuned as I write more on winning the foodie war and gaining food peace.

My next blog will be on: “Eating is a skill.” Eating. It takes the right kind of skills.

So, do not lose hope. Grab a hold of hope (and a glass of water!)

As always, I am in your corner cheering you on.

Fiercely committed,

Denise 

Four simple rules to live by…

Do you remember when the book came out that everything we need to know in life to be successful we learned in kindergarten?   I just love it when people have insights and perspectives that really keep life simple. Ever notice that we to often present the complex human emotional and spiritual train wreck aspects and we can bring so much drama and trauma to everyday situations? 

As many of you know, for the last couple of years I have enjoyed early morning spin classes at the Y on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Great way to start the day! My favorite spin instructor is Carl Marsh. Every Wednesday morning for years…this incredible man has instilled in me (and other spinners I am sure) that getting up at 4:30am and getting a morning work out was an amazing investment into our own health and well being. Carl makes it a point to know all the names of every person that takes his class.  What a great message he sends about the value and uniqueness of every participant and he recognizes the fore thought (pretty sure you just don’t happen to find yourself in a 5:10am spin class!) and sometimes the courage it may have taken for a newbee to show up to a class with a bunch of fit regulars. The wonderful benefit to all of us taking Carl’s spin class is that we learned each other’s names as well. Eventually the opportunity to also learn “the story” of the person that happens to sit next to you or in front of you etc. occurs and that is what I always call “bonus” round. It is such a treat. I have been so inspired by the amazing and incredible people that I cross paths with…and to think in some classes you work out with people for months or years and never even know their name.  Well, as you can tell, Carl is a terrific instructor. However, I told you all that so I could now tell you one of the most important things he has taught me. Carl faithfully recites his four rules for his spin class every time. Ahhh, four simple rules to spin by. I hope Carl doesn’t mind, but I decided long ago to adapt them to four simple rules to live by. And, now I will share these four simple rules with you (in no particular order).

Rule #1:  Water. Drink plenty of water!

Stay hydrated. Your body is a working machine and it needs to stay hydrated. My mentor and friend Julia Havey is probably very happy to see this rule. Julia has been encouraging people of all ages and sizes to drink water.  Carl encourages us to drink water before, during and after his spin class. Hey, these are two of the smartest and nicest people I know and they both say drink water.  So, water is my drink of choice.  I no longer consume any soda pop at all.  See if you can faithfully drink at least 64 oz of water a day. (Just be careful the water is not laced with sugar. Crazy thing, but you need to read even a water bottle label to not get surprise ingredients by some marketing genius.)  

Rule #2: Stay safe!

Seems like good advice to me.  Daily I am reminding my teenager and pre-teen about a variety of safety rules.  I certainly expend a lot of energy in keeping my kids, husband, students, employees, house, car etc. all safe. What kind of energy do I exert to keep myself safe?  Hopefully we all can say that we are very mindful and proactive in being safe.  Obvious for a work out to be safe, we must use good technique.  Don’t use bad form or subsequent pain to a variety of joints and the back may occur as well as you lose out on the benefit of the move.  Also, when beginning a fitness program. Start small and build.  It is shameful to see so many weekend warriors that jump into an exercise program by thinking that on day one they are going to do an hour on the treadmill or run for 3 miles or do 500 crunches…You can get hurt.  Most will find they are so miserable on day two and three that there are no more trips back to the gym. The person is just left with the negative impression of pain being associated with exercise. My exercise program started with a 15 minute walk. It was doable. It was relatively pain-free, although I was a bit out of breathe because I tried to use swift steps.  The next day, I walked for 16 minutes.  As I tried spinning, weight lifting, swimming, and running etc., I would ask experienced people for tips about the sport. Many injuries are preventable, so be safe.  If you have not exercised in a while, please make sure you see your doctor for a physical. Follow your doctor’s advice and make your health care provider a partner in your health plan. Staying safe is having good blood pressure, a steady and regular heart rate, normal body fat percentage and normal cholesterol levels. Nutrition is key to body safety and keeping your numbers healthy. 

Something that people do not think about with safety is getting good sleep.  I work and play hard every day.  I know for a fact, I need good sleep to function and think clear.  Thinking clear leads to good decisions.

Rule #3: Challenge yourself!

The body adapts to ensure survival. Muscles get stronger. Endurance builds. Joint flexibility increases. The biggest obstacle that holds you back from some really magnificent physical adventures is…YOU. Too many of us have conditioned our mind to think we are not capable…not strong enough or thin enough or fast enough etc. Try imagining no limits of what you can do.  Push yourself a bit harder next time out. Believe in yourself.

My 15 minute walk became a marathon achievement in 15 months time. There was no stopping me.  I dreamed it. Made a plan. Worked consistently towards my goals.  I was over 300 pounds the day I took my 15 minute walk.  The body is meant to move. I set small goals early on…like sitting up in bed verses rolling out of bed.  See and touching  my toes. If someone would have asked me then if I would lose half my body weight and run a marathon, I would have thought them crazy. Interesting how my mind thinks different now. I remember the day some one asked me after I just finished a 15 mile race if I thought I could complete a marathon…I replied back, “if I line up at a start line, I always finish.” There is only one mind set to have – “I CAN!”  Get your mind right and your body will follow. There is a famous saying: The impossible is only impossible until you do it.  Re-program your mind today. Get ATTITUDE! Live differently then you did yesterday. Remember to walk one minute further or speed up next time at the finish or crunch out one more set. I live by this because this is the legacy my children will one day say I passed on to them. 

Rule #4: Have fun!

Have you ever met the person that comes up with every excuse not to exercise?  I think the main reason is that they have not yet found the activity that is fun to them.  Don’t get me wrong.  Moving a 300+ body was no where near fun in the beginning. But an amazing thing happened as I persevered ahead with my faithful exercise routine.  I began to look forward to my walking time.  I could think through my problems. I found myself dreaming of adventures. I became proud of the fact my miles steadily were increasing. Within six weeks of starting, I was having fun. When I joined a running team, my original reason was for accountability and increase intensity to burn fat more efficiently. I had no idea that the running club members were the nicest people I ever met.  Those runners were my new heroes.  Six years later, I am still running with my club. My exercise life is also my social life now. If you enjoy what you are doing…ahhh you will continue to do it. If you are not having fun, then you will last only as long as your initial motivation holds out. According to the numbers at the health club already this year…Many New Year resolutioners are gone after three weeks.

Swim is you like the water. Bike if you are the man and machine type. Walk. Run. Play volleyball…dodge ball…get your Black Belt…Find your joy.  Live with passion. Find the adventures in life.  My friend and mentor, Marathon Don has role modeled this virtue and has inspired many people to live a fuller more meaningful crazy life. Being happy should not elude you.  Life happens. I have experience sadness and loss and have allowed for the grief. There was a time I was hopeless and felt helpless. Then I focused on the only thing I could control -my thoughts. I’ve learned that moments will slip away so fast. And all those moments turn to days. And days to weeks. And weeks to years.  We each have one life to live, and this is it. 

Be happy.

As always, I am in your corner cheering you on!

Denise

CAN.

This morning I got up to a winter storm warning for lower Michigan and upon looking out my kitchen window saw the steady falling of light fluffy snow. For a very brief moment, a nagging negative thought enter my mind of how hard it is to run in cold slushy snowy roads, and perhaps a cozy morning spent inside getting some put off chores done would be a better option instead of my first 5K of 2009.  Then I dashed that negative thought away and reminded myself that it is the races that are the most difficult to run that have the sweetest finish and make for great memories. After all, my body is meant to move and running with traction challenges will strengthen my core and legs muscles even more.  In fact, slippery conditions slow the really fast runners down a bit and I can actually keep some of them within view. What was I thinking?

 I can run this 5K today.

 I will run the 5K today.

 And I did.  Second place in my age/gender division.

I stayed for the Grand Rapids Running Club meeting after the race.  I was nominated for a new position with the club – Wellness Director. Very fit die hard runners believe in me.  The very people who inspired me to preserve on and accept fitness challenges have asked me to join ranks and help get our club numbers up and get our community healthier. My new job will be to recruit non- traditional runners to join our club and participate in the race events. It does go along with my mission to help others be healthier, so this will be a worthwhile volunteer position. Hope some of you will be able to be on the course with me soon! 

CAN.

By the time I got home I was very hungry. Lunch time.  I had planned for a poached egg on Ezekial toast. Side of steamed broccoli with a half cup of fat free cottage cheese. One sugar free dark chocolate pudding for dessert. I have a menu plan. One that is whipped up fairly quickly and easily. However, for one crazy moment, the sugar cookies (green and gold frosting –the school colors with monogram of the school’s name carefully placed on each one.) I made them night before for my son’s basketball team (snack after the game) were calling my name! Gee, I thought, I just burned around 400 calories at a race this morning one little cookie won’t hurt. Yet, I was quickly able to squelch these sabotaging thoughts and reminded myself how hard I ran and that my body truly needed fueling for rebuilding. It needs protein and complex carbs.  NOT sugary food with no nutritional value. And of course what really would keep me from eating two or three…

 I can eat healthy portion controlled meals as planned.

 I will eat healthy and in control.

And I did.

4:00pm Got dressed for my son’s basketball game. Yes! My pants feel like they are getting looser and I feel great from the morning run. I can hear myself humming along with the radio. I look in the mirror and like what I see. Especially, my smile.

As I sit in the bleachers cheering on the fifth grade boy’s Panther team I hear the coach yelling from the sideline. “You can do this!”  Let’s go guys – let’s play smart ball out there.

And they did. They won 28 to 15. My young, really not so talented basketball playing son (who did have a number of great assists and rebounds) came running and leaping off the court after the game and excitingly exclaimed: “ We won! Coach said I was awesome! Did you see me? I was great and I really can do anything mom!!!”

CAN.

You can.

Believe.

Live smart.

You can.

You will. All your “can-do” moments add up and you can find yourself healthier and happier; and living the life of your dreams.

Keep me posted on your wicked good life.

As always, I am in your corner cheering you on.

Fiercely committed,

Denise